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Working together to end domestic violence and abuse.

What is domestic abuse?

Domestic abuse can happen to anyone.

Domestic Abuse is the actual or threatened physical, emotional, psychological, sexual or financial abuse of a person by a partner, family member or someone with whom there is, or has been, a close relationship.

Have you been hurt by someone you love?

Are you safe?

Does someone you love...

  • Hurt you?
  • Control you; emotionally, physically, sexually or financially?
  • Intimidate you?
  • Shout at you, call you names, insult you or tell you what to or not do?
  • Threaten you in any way?
  • Say that the abuse isn't that bad, or that it's your fault?
  • Promise to change and say it will never happen again?

It will probably happen again.

It's not your fault.

We can help.

Is someone you know in an abusive relationship?

There's no simple way to know whether someone you know is experiencing abuse, but there are signs that you can look out for. They may be small at first, but over time they may become more obvious. Here are some examples of changes in behaviour that may occur:

  • Changes in clothing and hairstyle
  • Isolation and withdrawal from friends and family
  • Changes in use of social networking sites – such as posting fewer updates, removing photos or deleting friends
  • Cancelling plans or making excuses not to spend time with friends
  • Clock watching
  • Constantly apologising for a person's behaviour
  • Depression or anxiety, less happy than they used to be, changes in behaviours
  • Inappropriate clothing for the time of year or environment

What can you do?

If you know or suspect a family member, friend, or work colleague is experiencing domestic violence, it may be very difficult to know what to do.

Your first instinct may be that you want to protect your friend or family member, but intervening can be dangerous for both you and them. Of course, this does not mean you should ignore it – there are things you can do to help make them and their family safer. If you witness assault you can call the Police on 999.

If your friend is open with you and acknowledging the abuse, this is a positive sign and an indication that they trust you. Try to keep in touch with them so that they don't become more isolated. This is often a danger in an abusive situation. However, the decision to leave the relationship has to ultimately come from them, and can sometimes take several attempts before they leave the relationship for good.

Try to remind them that domestic violence is always the fault of the abuser.

Encourage your friend or family member to seek professional help and to prioritise their safety at all times. Try not to be impatient or judgemental and keep the lines of communication open at all times. You will be a lifeline to your friend or family member.

If you or someone you know is experiencing domestic abuse you can seek help and support from Calan DVS. We provide specialist support services, designed to support individuals and families to stay safe.

Every week, two women die at the hands of their male partner or ex-partner

Useful links

The useful links below will enable you to access other websites providing relevant information and support on domestic abuse and related issues.

All Wales Domestic Abuse and Sexual Violence helpline 08088010800 www.allwaleshelpline.org.uk

Children & Young People

Childline 0800 1111 www.childline.org.uk
NSPCC www.nspcc.org.uk

Are you a man experiencing domestic abuse? You can contact Calan DVS or:

The Dyn Project 0808 801 0321 www.dynwales.org
Respect www.respect.uk.net

General domestic abuse information

Safe Lives www.safelives.org.uk
Welsh Government www.livefearfree.org.uk
Home office www.gov.uk/domestic-violence-and-abuse